Underneath the Surface

lost.

2009-03-03T23:27:00.003+08:00

I feel lost. No motivation, not like I used to have. Call it irresponsibility, but I just can't seem to get motivated by duty, unless it adheres to my personal priorities or direction. What happens when something deemed as having the highest priority slips off the chart despite futile efforts of clinging on, not letting go? Your direction, motivation, energy, most of what constitutes meaning to you, goes along with it. Not a particularly enjoyable experience.

I don't know what else I can do. Anymore.

Eyes in the shadows. Remnants of a body which clung on to the light.

Leave it at that for now.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bloated egos used to irk me. Now I see it as just another form of self-delusion. However, there are also people who underrate their own abilities and potential and end up missing out on many of the things life has to offer. Some underestimate the level of their true potential, and others habitually choose to overlook the fact that the limit to what they can do is actually quite distant.

Actually, we all have a bit of both in us, just that some have more than others. We naturally tend to feel confident (many times overconfident) in our perceived areas of competency, but we should also acknowledge the fact that there exists many others who are even more competent in these areas, and appreciate the value of humility.

On the other hand, there are also times when we may feel that we lack the ability to do certain things, when the only obstacle to the liberation of our unused potential is our mind. By overcoming this obstacle, we may have the chance of discovering new lands in previously uncharted territory and claiming it as our own.

In essence, there's nothing wrong about not being the best, but not being the best you can leaves only regrets.

I know it's possible, guess I'll just have to convince myself that other causes are worthy too.

2009-02-22T00:26:00.002+08:00

没人知道自己的心，不好过。多想找个人来倾诉，但同时也知道，有些事是必须独自承受的。不好过，也得过。就算别人把错觉当真，就算多么的煎熬，也没理由解释。反正解释了，错觉也不能变成事实。干脆忍着。

一直那么不理性地渴望自己的付出会被注意到，却总是在被现实唤醒的那一刻选择沉默。

一直以来都活在自己的梦幻世界里，说服和欺骗自己，告诉自己一切所想的都是真的。

一直以来依靠的那股动力现已不存在, 也渐渐失去以往让自己付出一切的那种决心.

懦弱，从来都不是自己的风格．但不知怎么的，还是会身心不由己，去做一些或想一些莫名奇妙的事．辛苦耕耘却没收获，才领悟到牛顿第三定律只处于物理的世界里．

爱人难。不去爱自己所爱的人，不但更难，还多了一种难以形容的痛。

在嬉皮笑脸的面具下，双眼依旧凝望着．能看见快乐和幸福，也算是一种欣慰．

还是一样，由衷地送上沉默祝福．

tired and flopping around

2008-10-24T00:40:00.002+08:00

It has been a long time since the heat of the green and hopeful was still intensely ablaze. He did not know what the pain was like then, he was just too engrossed in his pipe dream. Much was grossly misinterpreted. Green, no doubt. Then came the deafening silences, and the merciless accelerations. The light of the truth beyond the pipes finally began sifting through the cracks he was once blind to. Yet, with a thoroughly proofread devotion, he clung on. Occasional misinterpretations plastered up, or more like hid the cracks again, waiting for the next impact. It came just as he was sprinting at full speed through the pipe, shattering the mediocre attempt at self-persuasion.

He knew that his interests did not matter as much to him, so he chose selflessness. He tried to only appear when his services were requested, and hoped, though somewhat not very confidently, that he meant more than convenience. He tried not to think, for when he did the rift would open and threaten to tear him apart, but it was inevitable.

2007-12-15T22:48:00.000+08:00

也不懂怎么搞得。。
每当我已差不多要绝望的时候，简单的一次接触就把我抛回原点。
又开始痛了。
每当我的视线开始模糊的时候，那微不足道的舍不得也让我心甘情愿地跑回去。
始终就是放不下。
以流汗代饮酒精、肉体的疲惫代心灵的憔悴；等待着每一天的黎明，希望有一天它的曙光能够穿透遮挡住美丽憧憬的浓雾。
咳。。。
叹的每一口气仿佛在增加浓雾的厚度、吹走那在草原上唯一竖立着的蒲公英、冰冻了我那原本烧着熊熊烈火的心。
算了吧。
还是放不下。
再继续挣扎吧。

2007-12-11T22:52:00.000+08:00

Virgo the Perfectionist

2007-12-02T02:08:00.000+08:00

maybe i guess thats why. why it's impossible for me to let go. looking forward with hope, waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel? will it be there? will you be there?

procrastination is not always a bad thing. kinda wish i delayed the pain now.

freak it.

2007-11-29T03:34:00.000+08:00

我愿意默默地守候、等待。
我相信我能做得到。

看不见你的笑，我怎么睡得着
你的声音这么近我却抱不到

2007-11-26T12:33:00.001+08:00

Warcraft used to be the icon i click first when i sit down at the computer, but now all i have on is Internet Explorer. Doing this same routine every night might be taxing, even boring, but i think it's worth it. Possibly just me and me alone. They say it makes people go crazy. I didn't understand. Well now i do. And it's tormenting, yet blissful. I really do wish the latter would take over forever, but for that to happen i know i must do it. But to do it will involve a risk of losing it, which would mean torment taking over. Decision or choice?

Giving without reciprocation sounds great, but feels like shit. Not that it's anyone's obligation. I would take all these, but without any light at the end of the tunnel to look forward to, this sucks. Maybe i'm dimming that light myself, but i just can't console myself when i don't see concrete results. "Believe and you will achieve". Sounds nice, but wait till u try believing in something that isn't there.But thinking of it again, what have i actually given? Do these minute contributions even count? Maybe they do, but are they enough? I want to do more, but what if it only leads me further down the hole?

So many what ifs. I say cause i'm afraid to lose it, cause i cherish it, telling myself it's not cause i'm a coward. But thinking of the bigger picture, isn't being afraid to lose what i cherish another cowardly thought? Finding the courage to do all these takes time, or rather requires that moment, that spurt. But this i cant afford to procrastinate, or the result would be worst than just losing it.

Damn it.

2007-11-26T01:36:00.000+08:00

不敢豁出去，是因为不想冒险、害怕失去。
但不去尝试，又怎么知道结果呢？
难道就要永远默默地承受吗？
太多因素、后果。。。
明明就不该去想的嘛。
但。。。

懦夫。

2007-05-26T23:36:00.000+08:00

in a seemingly real nest of foreigners lays the cuckoo's egg. born from isolation, into a society with peers of title, sadly, nothing more. affiliations concrete, or cement? long ago, lotus root. held together by nothing more than strand. chopped into pieces, big into big pot, small into small. or none. bland soup, thick soup. mix them and they look homogeneous. looks can be deceiving. underneath just a suspension. oil and water. water and oil. fat ass. sunflower and olive. sink, olive. watch sunflower float up to the light as you go down. might ease the pain. you can try to swim up if you want to, tread it awhile if you like. bathe in the warmth. and as they rise, just submerge. into whatever you think is underneath. probably a void. savour it. cause thats all you've got.

2007-01-02T22:01:00.000+08:00

that's it. this is the last of the holidays. last of slacking. last of lifeless stoning. last of stupid gaming marathons(hopefully). last of copying(try la hor). last of living life day by day without direction. last of walking in the fog. last of being lost.

now what the heck was that. an attempt at new year resolutions maybe. haha.

time to sleep. goodnight.

2007-01-02T02:04:00.000+08:00

time must be a bird.

or a plane.

no superman.

wadeva it's just weird. i swear i was figuring out how to use the dhs buttons for the first time only yesterday.

and talking about time, im bad at it. really. and somewhere in a crevice of my brain i know the truth. these damned games are gonna ruin my life. yes i know it, but somehow my cursor always seem to swiftly hover over the dreaded icon and click it twice. its like lighting a cigarette. a looooong one. argh wad can i do. boredom is not my choice. yea right.

hmm. it's weird that tomato puree actually mixes with lard. well. damn well. like they're the same thing, binded by an omnipresent psychic force. eww.

you know, affiliations can sometimes be scary. or rather sad.

morning. happy 2nd jan.

Asakura Yoh

2006-08-18T20:50:00.000+08:00

after watching a few episodes of shaman king, i realised the main character, Asakura Yoh, is more than a mere character. to me, he represents a kind of perfect personality. optimistic, for example smiling cheerfully at his enemies, humble (nothing changes even when he becomes much more powerful), and the one i admire most, able to touch the heart of even his arch enemies and make friends with them. that's his true power.

many a times, we tend to look at other people's negative points more than their positive points, and sometimes even brand those whom who have more slightly more obvious weaknesses as someone they can't accept. reflecting a bit, i feel like a bloody sinner. now as i think of it, i feel really bad that i often neglect people's good points but instead emphasise on their weaknesses or sometimes just something about them that doesn't seem correct to me. TO ME. that, i've realised might not be correct. who am i, c'mon, the all-knowing, always right, never wrong?

haiz. to all those people around me i might have neglected or misunderstood, i'm sorry. =(

from now on, i truely wanna try to program myself to seek out the good points of others and learn to appreciate them, understand them.

this is my goal, goalkeepers scram. =)

2006-08-17T20:52:00.000+08:00

update update!!! heh.
service learning on saturday. wonder how the kids will react to our items. hope its positive though. =)
oh yess. basketball incident. due to the fact that my life might be in danger if a certain packet drink company boss stumbles upon this, i shall shroud my words in mist. heh.
on the third day of the third section of the eighth section of the year 2006, which also happens to be the day before the day before the day before the day which is two days from now, erm, ok yesterday, we were deriving entertainment by trying to help a certain tangerine colour sphere find its way to its destination when a passing kind soul brought to our attention the news of the "not so sweet" chrysanthemum tea inventor's presence in the area destinated for the consumption of edibles, which also happens to be close to the location where we were deriving our entertainment. so anyway, upon receiving the sound waves broadcasted by the kind soul, we decided to place ourselves on the floor as we preferred not to be sighted in our thin white buttoned tunics, for the results were prophesied to be disasterous. as he approached our location, we realised that in the corner of this rectangular area of entertainment, there were a rather large gathering of feminine juveniles dressed in the white buttoned tunic that were destined for catastrophe. to our horror, he began journeying to that corner. but also to our suprise, they suddenly did some kind of a wave action which reminded me of a certain movement-based art form otherwise known as dance. we were like WOW. splendid tactic. the not so sweet packet drink company boss halted. and retreated back to his air-conditioned lair.

HAHAHA!!! pro right them!!!

2006-08-10T00:18:00.000+08:00

haha. check out the designer of this skin, he rocks. littleGREENman, featured on blogskins.com. anw, just some acknowledgement.

national day today, the programme was kind of short this year, but the aerial view of the performances telecasted were cool. can imagine how long they took to coordinate all that. and my malay neighbours next dour sort of had a big gathering, and they kept shouting and cheering everytime a part of the show went "sky-high", because my block has a view of the sky over the stadium . at first i was cool with it, but after the flying of the flag, came the fighter jets, then the small fireworks, and when the grand finale fireworks came, they went bonkers. lol, crazy.

mep essay(topic not chosen), biolo essay(dunno what topic also). dead ym.

2006-08-07T20:28:00.000+08:00

hah. i'm not gonna allow someone to fourth that. no way man.

life is getting so tough. find me a subject which doesn't bombard us with assignments, and i'll... erm, feel a wee bit consoled. well, it's the default singaporean teen life i guess. especially in this TOP GOVERNMENT SCHOOL. wow.

during the talk, i felt that philosophy was rather cool, and i was even looking forward to taking that love-wisdomly subject in the future, until chaoslayer told me it was dumb cause his answers were either yes or no, thus dividing everything into two. lol.

quote of the day: "something something respect you something juvenile delinquency something something dictator something why are you here."

????????????

was i ever a friend in your eyes? or just some redundant creature for you to push around? i don't know this, but at least i know i've tried. hard. and probably failed.

2006-07-30T23:36:00.000+08:00

that's it. i've decided. and you're not worth it.

the world doesn't exist to please you, bastard.

why not you quit looking at all the things that piss the oh so great YOU and think about those who's been there, or at least tried to be there for you before you gave them a slap on their faces, or a stab in their backs.

you think you're the center of the universe? think again.

2006-07-23T12:41:00.000+08:00

wa. i think the interval between my posts are shocking. like pikachu liddat. but anw, please stop trying to frame me up as the "physics pro" or something. cuz 人家会不好意思的... KIDDING KIDDING!!! haha no lar.. just feels weird, and whats more, got quite a few get same or higher than me mah.. ok i shall not dwell on this pointless topic.

recently i've discovered that i've developed a liking for fruits like pears, otherwise known as 李, oops i mean 梨... anw its just that the fruit is kinda nice cuz it has that sensitive touch that makes me wanna cry, u know. but sometimes the fruit just makes me feel sad and outcasted, like a poor black crow... and sometimes when i look at the fruit, it just starts tearing and rolling out of the room. hmm... and whats more, it's only been added to my BIG FAMILY for awhile. cool.

nice fruit. not to mention it looks a bit shrivelled.

well <<(no water, no frog at the bottom), good luck to us!

BACK!!!

2006-07-03T01:31:00.000+08:00

haha. so nice to feel online again. thanks mr technician.

well, today has taught me a lesson. the meaning of true friends, that is. it's not that i didn't try to blend in, maybe it's just because i'm the residue and i'm fated to eventually sink to the bottom of you guys. or maybe it's because the world revolves around you. useful? feel free to join us. if not, cya. that's how it has always been, and i'm sick of it. bye.

haha. i'm starting to like sec3 squad more now. (:

random.

2006-06-09T21:18:00.000+08:00

hmm. was browsing through my pictures, in search of something interesting i might come across. and amazingly i've come across a few pictures i don't even rmb having, and some which bring back fond memories, and others just random. here goes....

this was after finding out our beloved english teacher was in s'pore idol.

art project. twojay times...

acc project. yum.

wahaha!!! i'm a pro! this is not AI ok...

ok nvm i'm still a noob (in case ppl like rodion come look at this. haha.)

maple... cute little blue snail. (:

guess who this guy is from?

NEOPETS!!!

lol i rmb i used this image to replace one of the little fighter characters. funny.

BRISBANE!!!

miss the fun times... and the seniors... sigh.

anw, can u spot the zombies? and the weird thing on the guy's hand. 0_o

bye.

2006-06-06T22:52:00.000+08:00

ok. out of my sheer determination not to follow in george's footsteps, i shall utilise my limited vocabulary as much as my ability allows to type something. argh this feels like squeezing toothpaste out of an empty tube. ok nvm.
lets see.
today 9:30am, i went for a rather pleasant piano lesson. apart from the fact that my teacher love to sing the melody while i play, which is rather disturbing. haha hope she doesnt read this. ok i din say anything. anyway, she gave me a rather interesting new piece. i think it was called persian market or something, haha im too lazy to walk that few metres to check. anw, since i heard the band version at vj band concert, sight-reading it was much easier for a sad piano noob like me. haha. incidentally, SHE's bo1 si1 mao1 is from one of the themes in this piece. funny how SHE likes classical music. and im not referring to some girl. lol. "funny how SHE likes classical music." sounds like sarcasm. ok ANW (stop guessing, it's not a new warden or ah nu wa or american nut wanton), like always, i'll pick up the new score and try to find some nice melody. so i sat down and played non-stop for whos knows how long. haha. when i got up my pants were like stuck to my numb butt la.
other than practising the piano, i think i practically lazed my way through the day.. sigh... my precious youth... my precious.. my precious.... MUAHAHA!!! MY PRECIOUS!!! and he drops into the lava. dotz. nvm... haiz... i feel kinda stuck here at home... before yesterday, i was like thinking if i really wanna go out then can go band rm prac, or teach my juniors, as in THOSE WHO DESERVE IT. yea. i've decided. i'm not going to waste my time . i'll just teach those who are willing to learn. try giving me ATTITUTE, u can go teach yourself. see how far your nice attitude will carry you. seriously, i feel quite sad looking at some of them now. seeing them, i cant help but think of my sec1 days in band. when i was sec1, i felt like i was part of something big, and i was really proud to be in it. even to the extent of making a sort of diy box for my yamaha mouthpiece. yea, yamaha. and seeing how some of my juniors treat the instrument now makes me feel like i've failed to teach them properly. sigh. anw i still feel rather disappointed that we couldnt have a combined in sch. and to think i spent like 30 over sms-es trying to get it together. sad.
my holidays kinda sucks, and it's all because of my sucky results, which in turn is because of the sucky way i treat my schoolwork. i dunno, but i just cannot be motivated to go the extra mile for things i do not enjoy or am passionate about. it's just an odd feeling of no motivation, laziness, boredom, lack of self-discipline, all churned together in a blender. one sad ice blend coming up, and that'll be eighty cents, thank you.

good night.

2006-05-24T19:25:00.000+08:00

the stress is seriously too much for me to take. A'level MEP, dhp electives, all the homework and projects... so i've decided to take SAP MEP and drop elects, at least that'll help abit... i hope.

and i should really go reflect on my attitude... feel so guilty...

life's hard... well at least for me...

2006-05-19T00:25:00.000+08:00

haiz. seriously too busy to update this dead... thing.

anw, my results this half of the year has given me a psycological trauma.
its a scar... that can never be erased...

sigh...

i've done some thinking, but i still dunno wad to do...

ANW.......

THANKS TO ALL THE PPL WHO HELPED ME IN ERM..... "studies" (saying the real thing might give me a bit of problem...)

just to name a few,
thx alicia for ur, erm, references..
thx george for helping me hand up. woot.
thx grace for the foolscap :)
thx chengyi for question papers... i can never seem to find mine once i put them in my folder
thx amanda for scissors and glue, u shld go open a stationary shop.
thx dora for typing, u saved my life
thx geneve for the compre, although it wasnt used...
thx gel for maths references
thx anyone else who has helped me b4

TYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTYTY.

alot.

somehow, i feel kinda guilty... dun really feel right getting help from so many ppl... haiz...

my life is messed up.

shit.

2006-05-06T00:32:00.000+08:00

maths test. 6/25. dunno how many others got the same as me. but it's not enough. if others can do it, why cant you?

banned from games.

I TRIED, OK?! I FREAKING TRIED.

but dun worry, i'll work hard for better results, so you can set even higher standards.

see im so nice.

bullshit.

2006-05-02T20:29:00.000+08:00

tuesday:

had physics first thing in the morning, watch ippo get thrashed... lol.. then was LA, watched THE OTHERS.... rarr... not as scary as i expected... but quite cool though... smack the door in her face... muahaha...

then was take 5! seriously, i never knew that so many sec3s could sing, quite well too... and zhai rui's dance was cool..

maths was as usual, graphs... but at least today not so bad, just copying from ppl's presentation...

LAI LAI LAI!!! DA JIA YI QI LAI!!! wahaha today we learn TOURISM!!! COOL MAN!!! 0_o
no it isn't cool... it was so freaking boring can.. then must bear with it for one hour some more.. haiz...

then was chinese... DOUBLE chinese... but it was still ok... compo reading session... time pass faster...

MEP TEST...
sure fail liao... i pass i treat all of you eat kachang puteh...

then was concert rehearsal... mrs loke was in a terrible mood... and apparently no one passed the test... :(

sianz....

2006-05-01T22:33:00.000+08:00

argh.. mep is killing me... and did i mention that the biggest source of boredom in my life is classical symphonies... arrghh...

jiayou for the test ppl...

li0n_king: want to laugh then laugh lor... 0_o
...: yea i'm still a web noob after all you know... lol...
tong²: good job for cs concert, it was good:)
yunjing: yea wadeva... go find your gold in the clouds la... haha...
shixun: don't stop, gogogo!!!
jh: good luck for mep too... london...
junjunwenwen: who's tagging ar? cannot see leh...
kiw joo sok and gang: wa funny ar? lol go bake cookie la you...

2006-05-01T10:34:00.000+08:00

i'm tired.

i'm tired of the endless mountain for schoolwork.
i'm tired of tests every week.
i'm tired cause i just can't get you to understand
i'm tired of your expectations.
i'm tired of fake faces.
i'm tired of the way you treat friendship.

let me rest.

please.

2006-04-29T22:15:00.000+08:00

i shall make a pathetic attempt to revive this dead thing... but since i dun feel like blogging about "wad happened today", i shall put this instead

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion:

You have medium extroversion.
You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.
Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.
But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time."

Conscientiousness:

You have low conscientiousness.
Impulsive and off the wall, you don't take life too seriously.
Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions.
Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it's difficult for you to get important things done.

Agreeableness:

You have high agreeableness.
You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.
Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.
You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance.

Neuroticism:

You have low neuroticism.
You are very emotionally stable and mentally together.
Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly.
Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is low.
You're a pretty conservative person, and you favor what's socially acceptable.
You think that change for novelty's sake is a very bad idea.
While some may see this as boring, many see you as dependable and wise.

The Five Factor Personality Test

hmm...

2006-04-29T18:26:00.000+08:00

this sux.

2006-04-25T22:01:00.000+08:00

im sick

im ill

im dying from a chronical disease

QUADRATIC GRAPH-ISTIS

somebody save me, im dying...

2006-04-13T20:48:00.000+08:00

rhythm XX tmr.. hope all goes well...

but what's to come after that?

hmm...

2006-04-11T22:19:00.000+08:00

i did a bit of thinking just now, and i guess i was wrong about that incident...
the truth is, it wasn't sabo or betrayal or anything...

THREATEN

yeah man, it's THE HORSE WITH ZERO RATS

galloping to every class during the only time when we can ease the tension and stress of school life, the HORSE scans for any sign of humans placing edible substances into their mouthes, or looking for hair to eat, thinking it's hay.

so everyone, FEAR THE HORSE...
FOR HE IS ALMIGHTY
FOR HE REIGNS SUPREME
FOR HE IS THE ENEMY OF ALL THINGS EDIBLE

DOOM HAS COME...
FLEE WHILE YOU CAN

flee to the LULOO if you can reach it in time...

heh heh heh...

2006-04-10T20:22:00.000+08:00

lazy...

messed up...

tired...

procrastinating...

stress...

but let's face it, that's what life's about...

cheer up...

2006-04-05T18:07:00.000+08:00

wahahaha...
stupid dota game... mr rod was a stupid mhing pudge.. and zw had fabulous items.. he leave liao oso nth to take -_-
so anw im the ALMIGHTY THUNDERGOD!! if ur hp falls under 500, u noe u can si qiao qiao liao... lol... ok nvm the other team was sp sad that sk mh-ed they left... retarded..

anw today, maths was quite fun, for once.. as in the topic... sets are nice to draw:) and george has an intercom at his nipples..

geog was like, so sad.. i so desperately wanted to share my knowledge of pudong and s'pore with the class, but technical problems... haiz.. i love geog SOOO MUCH!! ILL!!!

wad. see wad see?

2006-04-04T23:20:00.000+08:00

ridiculous.

3ICHIBAN

2006-04-03T22:53:00.000+08:00

3 7 individuals, 1 identity
I onic bonding(triple) (includes metals like yuanlin and non-metals like george aka S2)
C hunky™ livens up the blog
H olding on tight to every ion, no one gets left out
I ce-cream can't be as cold as george
B ob is part of 3i, and will always be, just like any other member of 3i:)
A edes mosquito causes dengue fever, ions beware
N obody is nobody in 3ICHIBAN

we rock.

2006-04-02T19:01:00.000+08:00

haiz... i think im mad.. a pile of hw left and im still blogging...
chinese compo, physics assignment, maths assignment, mep...

AARRRHHHHHH!!!

miss lower sec life...

2006-03-30T22:35:00.000+08:00

haha maths was fun today... waged war on george... and poor george lost due to the unusually high levels of sulphuric content in his hair...

dotz.

2006-03-24T22:51:00.001+08:00

alright lets review our timetable today:
Interaction
Double Maths
Double Physics/Bio
Double MPP
TRIPLE HCL

most ions would react to this timetable with a sigh, but lady luck casted her spell and POOF! TRIPLE HCL became SINGLE HCL!!! ok, although this may seem like a miracle, there are prices to pay...

let hcl lesson be H, and one word of the compo be C

2H = 800C
H = 400C

since one period of HCL = 60 mins,

400C = 60 mins
C = 0.015 mins
C = 5.4 seconds
1 sec = 0.19C (2 sig. fig.)

so for every one second we spend enjoying our "freedom", we pay with about 20% of a chinese character... happy writing ppl...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Patience

patience is a quality that every one of us has, the only difference is how much. patience is to be respected, meaning that it should not be challenged for the wrong reasons. however, if one does challenge someone's patience, he should be aware that patience and tolerance has a limit. respect that, and you will be respected in return. ponder over these words, and perhaps you would find some meaning in it...

2006-03-24T22:51:00.000+08:00

2006-03-23T22:37:00.000+08:00

"All things therefore that you want people to DO to you, DO thus to them"

"Do not impose on others what you do not desire others to impose upon you."

"Let no man do to another that which would be repugnant to himself."

"Hurt not others in ways you yourself would find hurtful

"Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful."

"What you hate to suffer, do not do to anyone else."

i have recently put some deep serious thought into this, and now i really think it's very meaningful. we often do certain unpleasant things to others like playing tricks on them or make them feel embarrassed, stuff like that. i myself did many of those things, since god knows when, and to those whom i might have hurt, i'm sorry. i've come to realise that not abiding by these morals is nothing but sheer irony, and i am determined to change myself.

respect is not demanded, it is earned.

food for thought.

i'm not gonna put a title, what can you do about it? ban me from blogger?

2006-03-23T19:59:00.000+08:00

ok what happened today.. let me see... first lesson was LA, watched the KFC boy show... the sad little boy who entertains himself by:
1) superhero postcards
2) his hero: CUBIX™ (does that pathetic toy even have a trademark?)
3) rollerblading in a pathetic area of roughly 0.5m by 0.5m (around his poor granny)
4) his classic brickgame "gameboy", which soons runs out of battery, and led the boy to run out too (to buy batteries)

pls tell me if there's anything i missed.

i shall not elaborate on the movie since we all watched before (partially because i'm lazy)

next was PE, a torturous, sadistic session:
1) 950m run around school
2) pull-ups
3) 850 run around school again

ok maybe it wasnt so bad, felt quite accomplished after that anyway..

after that it was supposed to be chem, but due to the overwhelming power of our united class, INTERACTION OVERTHREW CHEMISTRY
woohoo! ok anw, we finally got a rough idea of our service learning...

maths was as normal as usual, except that mrs tan mentioned something about school bookshop selling bras... or two crab shells tied together, they mean the same thing...

ok at least we stopped the zi teng luo pu bu thingy for chinese lesson today, and did something a little bit more interesting, something to do with biyu, i think.. where ants become pi sai, tweety bird sings on the tree(dun ask me why), and cooked crabs become bras...

chem practical was quite fun, as usual.. yongchiang/akuzino/anoynomous/bob went to play with the splint by dipping it in some weird chemicals and burning it... and apparently, he came up with some new formulas:
1) wooden splint + zinc + bunsen flame = fireworks
2) wooden splint + copper chloride(Q) + bunsen flame = weird greenish flames

i came up with one too:
all the chemicals we used for practical today = AIDS cure, a yellow, brown, blue, green + white ppt thingy
GEORGE! YOU'RE SAVED!

thank me george, you're not going to die... (shit, what have i done...)

on the bus, mr bob went to spray some funny thingy on my arm, and i actually felt the effects on my leg... retarded spray...

ok end of post, thanks to Mr Dunno Wad Richter

And Thus A Blog Was Born...

2006-03-23T01:27:00.000+08:00

woke up, nth to do, bored, and thus a blog was born...
hope this doesnt turn out stagnant after awhile, like george's(for goodness' sake pls revive it)

anw, today(or rather ytd) was mildly interesting..
after flag raising, george was pressing down his shoulder for some apparent reason(i thought he was trying to be funny with the pledge), but actually it was a BEETLE abt THIS size. so me and yongchiang kindly accompanied him to the toilet to, erm, well, strip. as in he strip nt we strip... so he was like 1, 2, 3, then fling his uniform onto the floor with the beetle clingling on for dear life. the whole process was quite retarded, really..

and so lecture was cancelled, we went back to class, i did some equation solving with the beetle, sent it FLYING down under, and bye bye beetle..

after the beetle saga, we sat down the discuss LA and actually got something done.. haha good job ppl...

RECESS
apparently my pants were dirty and the whiteboard duster is a cleaning agent... thats what someone helped me with, clean it till it turned white...CHALKY WHITE. haha thx man...

physics today made me realise that i should seriously buck up.. looking at my answer again now makes me feel that mr koh was actually very nice not to throw me out of the class... haiz, i need 10 -inch socks..

maths was quite fun today, for it was one of the rare few days when i actually understand it...

ok i shall skip to geog...
i tried my best to keep awake, and i succeeded for like 40mins when i started to doze off(its geog, for goodness' sake), and according to grace and jean, i was trying to squash my own face.. they had a good laugh, haha mebbe dats one good thing i did today...

status: jianbao, log assignment, chem mini assignment, LA project, DIE DIE DIE...